The Possessed Printer and other Woes

from a chat a bit ago..........................


ME: heyya
ODDFRIEND#1: hey dude
ODDFRIEND#1: so sup?
ME: not much breaking my printer
ME: :-)
ODDFRIEND#1: um why are you breaking your printer?
ME: well it got jammed and is now not doing anything lol
ODDFRIEND#1: jeez
ODDFRIEND#1: well you are software person and not hardware person... LOL
ME: ok this sucks
ODDFRIEND#1: hmm is it dead Jim?
ME: damn it
ME: :-)
ODDFRIEND#1: um taking that as a yes
ME: damn blinking lights you'd think it was frickin merry xmas
ODDFRIEND#1: hehe have you pushed the blinking lights?
ME: yes mom I turned it on
ME: i pushed its buttons and now it is pushing mine
ME: okay this is scary
ODDFRIEND#1: hmm why?
ME: it is like having a seizure
ODDFRIEND#1: is it a possessed printer?
ME: I am wondering
ME: and I just put a new ink cartridge in which is what started this
ME: well that and jamming a piece of paper
ME: well it seems to be printing just seems to really shake more than I remember - lol
ODDFRIEND#1: haha possessed
ME: and hmm the test page finally came out
ME: I think colors are missing
ME: damn it wants color ink too greedy bastard
ODDFRIEND#1: its dead
ME: it can;t be dead
ME: okay now it is being a wise ass
ME: it is acting like nothing is wrong
ME: all lights and such normal
ME: but not printing
ME: I hurt its feelings
ME: damn it
ME: I am sorry crappy piece of HP printer I was making fun of you
ODDFRIEND#1: hmm how did you hurt its feelings... I know offer small sacrifices of kitchen appliances to it.
ME: please come back
ME: hehe
ODDFRIEND#1: ok turn it off
ODDFRIEND#1: hehe yep
ME: it is off
ODDFRIEND#1: ok turn it off and unplug it
ME: wait light still blinking
ME: dman it it is winking at me
ODDFRIEND#1: hehe then it's not off
ODDFRIEND#1: LOL
ME: wait this is weird
ME: I pushed the off button and now it is printing
ME: I am gettign very scared here
ME: :-D
ODDFRIEND#1: well of course it is a wierd printer... it's housed with a weird person
ODDFRIEND#1: hehe
ODDFRIEND#1: possessed dude
ME: it is going to start
ODDFRIEND#1: it has downloaded a computer demon
ME: printing out porn when i have guests over
ME: hehe
ODDFRIEND#1: haha I would love to see that
ME: I would not
ME: well not with guests over
ME: ;-)
ODDFRIEND#1: hehe but when you are by yourself more power to you
ODDFRIEND#1: lol
ODDFRIEND#1: why do I have images of mine and ODDFRIEND#3 posts printed out and in your grubby little hands as you are trying to take a nap
ME: ewwww
ME: and lol
ODDFRIEND#1: well am I right?
ME: no you are not right
ME: :-)
ME: my hands are not grubby ;-)
ODDFRIEND#1: hehe ok freshly washed hands then
ODDFRIEND#1: lol
ME: okay I think it is working finally but I ran out of paper
ODDFRIEND#1: hehe


Other friend weighs in


ODDFRIEND#2: Tell it that it can be easily replaced. I have a brand new printer sitting around here doing absolutely nothing.
ME: oh so you think I should threaten it
ODDFRIEND#2: I usually do.
ME: are you the printer mafia?
ODDFRIEND#2: I've been known to give a few cement shoes.
ME: hehe

A little later

ODDFRIEND#2: Awesome. Night (if I don't see you laters)
ME: and there goes ODDFRIEND#1 my printer scared you all away
ME: night
ODDFRIEND#2: :-D
ME: take care
ME: I am alone with my printer
ME: thanks peoples leave me to deal with the wacko equipment
ME: someone come online darn it
ME: :-)
ODDFRIEND#2: :-)
ODDFRIEND#2: Remember, threaten it.
ME: hmmm I hear crappy spooky music playing
ME: of darn alarm clock radio turned on, maybe it is in league with the printer….
ME: *oh
ODDFRIEND#2: LOL
ME: night


Ah the wonderful world of technology - lol