Monday, December 31, 2007

Happy New Year's Eve

Just wishing everyone a happy start to the new year

and man, I got a freak out in the mail today - lol - i got a letter that was for a supposed parking citation in Charleston SC - of course the issue was during the time and date of the supposed violation, I was working hard at my desk, in NJ hehe, luckily they typed in the letters wrong and the woman I spoke to fixed it all up, so that's set, but whew, a nice way to cap the year.

Also got to get a bit more walking in and some more Ugly Betty, I really am liking that show.

Ok on to some chores and work and then celebrating later - hurrayyyyyy

Saturday, December 29, 2007

Vacation Saturday

Well stopped at this flea market today – it was cool, reminded me of the Swap Meet in Tucson. I splurged and got a few knives – I got this Robert E Lee knife with matching watch cover/fob, Marilyn Monroe jackknife, a King Arthur knife and a Dragon Claw split blade with twisted handle – very nice.

Then headed to the mall and got my hair cut. The stylist was nice. I asked about the story behind her tattoos and I found out she and her mom got matching ones, in fact they hace gotten a number together. I was like tttoooootttallly cool – That would be a neat thing to do and share.

My mom and I shared college a little. When I started at the U of A – she went back too. Which was cool, we shared the Van Tran (did not have a car so used her handicap service). And because she was blind I read her textbooks for her onto tape. We only took one class together, a religion class. Her major was Writing, theology and psychology. Mine geology so we did not have many classes we could share.

It was cool, we should have pledged together hahaha j/k

And yes my mom is where I got the writing from. She even was published in a few things – she did more poetry and all. But yeah she gave me the bug.

Going out for a nice walk and may go catch some music at a bar. Yes I am keeping busy, see my mind is on someone else and if I don't keep busy I start thinking and this type of thinking about this person is not the thinking I want to be doing, so….

Kathy recommended I try Arbor Mist and man it is good. Tried the Island Fruit last night and enjoying the peach now. It is nice and fruity and will fit with the stuff I am trying later. My sister got me this trial thing of flavored tequila and they have drinks to make so I will be trying those.

Plus I am working to.. I have set a goal of one year. One year to work toward moving. A lot can happen but… I started cleaning out closets and other thigns this break – getting organized and rid of junk if nothing else.

Finished the first three dvds of Ergo Proxy and I am hooked, wanna see the rest. Also watching first season of Ugly Betty. Someone recommended it and I am loving it already it is funnnnnyyyy and also sad – yes I was crying for Betty in some of the first eppy and all – I soooooo get her hehe

And more to watch, yes I am taking a true break this vacation….

Also doing a little work – gotta get my classes ready for next semester (they start around the 18th)

Advanced Web Design for the high school
Environmental Science (this semester I am going without a textbook – it is online)
Historical Geology
Earth Science

So doing work too

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

What a day

Christmas came

Christmas went

And it was a magically day, part of it. Watching little one enjoy the morning and hearing the squeals and all, magic, pure gold. Disney Xmas parade YAYAYAY one day I will be in Disney for xmas – yes another travel goal of mine – who wants to come with?

I also caught up on sleep, that was my xmas gift to me.

That and a few things I will do the week that T is gone with her dad – whewwwwww a whole week, so what trouble can I get into?

PS – Kathy if reading this – I am already addicted to that damn Pirates game. The first video anything in this house and damnnnnn it – I already am hooked and so is T – you dorkass…… greatttttt hehe

PSS – john played it a bit too until the you know who reminded him to go do something else hehe

Monday, December 24, 2007

trying not to be so negative - a little step but getting there

ok so i was a bit negative in my last post. I should not be like that during the holiday - so I will delay anymore negative until the 26th : )

Still working through things, but a little better, I have a ways to go, but... I am thinking and trying to see things from all viewpoints, a major pain in the ass and work compared to wallowing in blah, which I feel like doing... but I am trying not to do that. For instance, I exercised and colored today - hehe yes both can be very soothing - i like coloring a lot actually

I am currently working on this cool stained glass coloring book, i use sharpie markers. I like designs especially and so got this one which fits well - helps to let me think and focus and is soothing and creative too.

tonight night Therese and I will be going xmas light viewing - we'll drive around, her with her cocoa and me with a yummy vanillia chai and listen to xmas tunes and do the rating - we rate displays and ys the more flashy and animated and moving parts and all they have the more impressed we are - it is National Lampoon Time Baby

Sunday, December 23, 2007

Stupid words

Well it seems i backed off when I didn't know I was, I thought I was responding to them backing off and doing a good thing

I knocked someone off balance by something I did because they thought I meant something I didn't and it seems to have made things more messy and worse not better

I don't know what to do next

I din't know what to say to not be backing off or to be more to make them talk back to me

I don't know how to go after what I want

I don't know how to show more than friends

I don;t fucking know anything anymore

I just don't know

and I so badly want to know oh god I do

but i know this, I am not backing off, i will give space but i know what I want, I just need them to tell me what they want

Saturday, December 15, 2007

Defying Gravity

Well, as the song on myspace profile says right now, I did it, decided to defy gravity and I took a leap, I mailed her a letter - what the lyrics of that song say i think fit where I have finally come after all this time... so now, I have to use that old proverbial tennis analogy - hit the ball into her court, now we see if and how she hits it back.....

Defying Gravity (from the musical Wicked)

Something has changed within me
Something is not the same
I'm through with playing by the rules
Of someone else's game
Too late for second-guessing
Too late to go back to sleep
It's time to trust my instincts
Close my eyes: and leap!

It's time to try
Defying gravity
I think I'll try
Defying gravity

I'm through accepting limits
'Cuz someone says they're so
Some things I cannot change
But till I try, I'll never know!
Too long I've been afraid of
Losing love I guess I've lost
Well, if that's love
It comes at much too high a cost!
I'd sooner buy
Defying gravity
Kiss me goodbye
I'm defying gravity
And you can't pull me down:

My future is unlimited
And I've just had a vision
Almost like a prophecy
I know - it sounds truly crazy
And true, the vision's hazy
But I swear, someday there'll be

So if you care to find me
Look to the western sky!
As someone told me lately:
"Ev'ryone deserves the chance to fly!"
And if I'm flying solo
At least I'm flying free
To those who'd ground me
Take a message back from me
Tell them how I am
Defying gravity
I'm flying high
Defying gravity
And soon I'll match them in renown
And nobody in all of Oz
No Wizard that there is or was
Is ever gonna bring me down!

Monday, December 10, 2007

When a song sneaks up and hits you hard

Well this follows on the heels of the other blog entry I just posted – ahhhh music

Ok – I found a song today and fell totally in love, I mean this song made me cry and on all levels, not just the lyrics, but the musical score and the melody of the voice with the instruments and just… when I find her, this will be the song I give her, to dance with her at our wedding – that kinda deep song… ohhhhhh man I just… and to think I found this on a mix CD from a high school fundraising thing…. Mannnnnn

This song is for you, out there, where ever you may be… may it find it's way to your heart and soul and express what love 'aught to be (yeah I just made that up hehe)

Power of Love by Frankie Goes to Hollywood (yes the same group that brings you the song "Relax" – another song to dedicate to her, but that one is a bit more playful and frisky :P

"The Power Of Love"

I'll protect you from the hooded claw
Keep the vampires from your door

Feels like fire
I'm so in love with you
Dreams are like angels
They keep bad at bay-bad at bay
Love is the light
Scaring darkness away-yeah

I'm so in love with you
Purge the soul
Make love your goal

[1]-The power of love
A force from above
Cleaning my soul
Flame on burn desire
Love with tongues of fire
Purge the soul
Make love your goal

I'll protect you from the hooded claw
Keep the vampires from your door
When the chips are down I'll be around
With my undying, death-defying
Love for you

Envy will hurt itself
Let yourself be beautiful
Sparkling love, flowers
And pearls and pretty girls
Love is like an energy
Rushin' rushin' inside of me

[Repeat 1]

This time we go sublime
Lovers entwine-divine divine
Love is danger, love is pleasure
Love is pure-the only treasure

I'm so in love with you
Purge the soul
Make love your goal

The power of love
A force from above
Cleaning my soul
The power of love
A force from above
A sky-scraping dove

Flame on burn desire
Love with tongues of fire
Purge the soul
Make love your goal

I'll protect you from the hooded claw
Keep the vampires from your door

Musicals – There's Nuthin Like Them

Ohhhhh mannnnn I love music and a good musical is right up there with another activity that causes a cataclysmic orgasm (hehe) hmmm I wonder, doing said activity to the score of a good musical would be…. Mind-bending???? Hehe

But Saturday went up to New York and saw "Curtains". I enjoyed the trip and the musical. Every year a teacher from my school plans a trip up to see a musical. I have seen Fiddler on the Roof, Spamalot and this year Curtains. We go up, make very, very merry on the bus (yummy poinsettias) and then have time for lunch or shopping, see the show and come home.

I ate at a place called Beccos that had a tri-pasta menu. The one dish was yummy and unique, pumpkin ravioli made with cocoa floor (so chocolate look and taste). The venison rigatoni was good too (not eaten a lot of venison really).

I like the comedy musicals a little more, and this one definitely provided that. I also found I really connected with a couple of songs, one in particular, Coffee Shop Nights I could sing sometimes about my life. Then there was the song, I miss the Music… Oh I identified with that.

I found the trip fun, the music wonderful and just, ooo I wanna go back (yeah I love the big cities, always have)

Coffee Shop Nights

Cioffi (spoken): Detectives have no opening night, Miss Harris.
We make our entrance after the curtain has fallen on someone else’s life.

Niki (spoken): It isn’t wrong to be married to one’s work, is it?

Cioffi: Uh, no. No, not at all. Sometimes it’s no Honeymoon.
I love my job
I really do
And if I say so myself
I’m good at it too
I catch the bad guys
Well, most of the time
So it’s a good life
A perfectly good life
Not exactly sublime
When I’ve finished my work
And I crawl into bed
I reflect as I turn out the lights
That the day that’s to come
And the week that’s ahead will be
Lunch counter mornings
And coffee shop nights
Lunch counter mornings
And coffee shop nights

Niki(spoken): Well, it’s reassuring to have such a dependable schedule, like matinees every Wednesday

Cioffi(spoken): Or Brisket and broad beans each Thursday

Niki (spoken): With your friends

Cioffi: With, uh, yeah, well…
I like my pals
The guys on the force
We’re not very social
They’re all married of course
Sometime we go bowling
Or have a few beers
So it’s a fine life
A perfectly fine like
I’d give it two cheers
‘Cuz sometimes I think
At the end of the day
When I’ve read the last burglar his rights
That the life that I lead
Is a little bit grey
With its lunch counter mornings
And coffee shop nights
Lunch counter mornings
And coffee shop nights

Niki (spoken): But your acting roles. Well, don’t they make for a change?

Cioffi(spoken): Oh, Miss Harris, each year from May 23rd to the 12th of June, when I turn my life over to the Swallow Street Players, that’s more than a vacation for me. It’s an overture of hope. It’s the curtain rising on the greatest joy of my life.

But the rest of the year
The life that I lead
That’s a little bit grey
There are plenty of low days
And not many highs
Mostly lunch counter mornings
And coffee shop nights

I Miss the Music

Really? Well don't talk about love
Or you'll have to say "fits like a glove"
Or "As certain as push comes to shove"
You will pine for the woman you're constantly thinking of
You see the problem.

Dangling participle. So you suggest staying away from love?

At all costs. And don't mention your life
Or you'll have to say "cuts like a knife"
Or refer to the heartbreak and strife
When you find that you're missing your ...



You were saying what you miss.

No I meant that, well ...
(sung)I miss the music
I miss the song
Since she’s not with me
It comes out wrong
It doesn’t matter
How hard I try
I’ve lost the music
I don’t know why

You may have known
Before I met her
I wrote alone
But if you ask me
What I prefer
I’d say the music
I wrote with her

When you’re writing a song
And you’ve a partner
The room is filled with jokes and chatter
She says something
You say something
She writes a line
You play a vamp

But when you’re writing a song
Without a partner
That’s a completely different matter
No one tells you “That’s not funny”
No one says “Let’s cut that bar”
No one makes you better than you are

I can’t pretend
I miss the music
I miss my friend
No need to ask me
What I prefer

I choose the music
I wrote with her
I liked the music
I made with …

Georgia (spoken):
Aaron, I forgot my lyric. Can you believe it? Me.

Well you’re not the lyricist now, you’re the star.
Georgia? Break a leg.

Thanks. You can finish the song without me?

I’m a one-man band.
I miss the music
I miss my friend
No need to ask me
What I prefer

I choose the music
I wrote with her
I loved the music
I made with her

Saturday, December 01, 2007

Airports can make you giddy

I wrote this Nov 26 while in the Atlanta Airport trying to get home after my holiday trip


What I did today

Ok – flying can sometimes be an adventure after waiting in Atlanta airport for 10 hours, flight having been cancelled the night before and now it is delayed and changing gates like crazy – well – I got a little giddy… witness below…

Friend1: how is your luck going?
me: wellll
me: i had to change gates
me: so i said poof this and i am eating soup now
me: haha
me: spicy enchilada soup
me: and veggie sandwich :P
me: i go check in a bit - they aew still holding to a 35 minute delay
me: but at least i may get into atlantic city by say 1130
me: and home by 1230 or so
me: if my luggage is there
Friend1: aw
me: eh i just hope i get home or get my luggage my lez zepplin all girl all zepplin shirt is getting a bit.. worn.... hehe
Friend1: haha
me: of all the days i pick to wear a decidedly "out" t shirt
me: haha
Friend1: lol
me: but got nice looks and smile from the security shake down woman hehe
Friend1: lol
me: hey trying to stay positive here : )
Friend1: but of course
me: so do you have a full work week and other busy scheduled plans?
Friend1: mostly just work
Friend1: nothing too bad
me: and you went home for turkey day?
me: and that is cools
Friend1: home on sunday, then grandma's on turkey day
me: ah so you went over the river and through the woods then :P
Friend1: oh yeah
me: : )
me: hmmm
me: i checked online and now it looks like i am in a different concourse sheeeeeiiiiiitttttttt (said in redneck high pitched voice)
Friend1: aw
Friend1: should i just wait for you to reappear?
me: hehe
me: i am just going to keep getting on and off it is almost comical and entertaining :P
me: sorry
me: my humor is getting darker and blacker by the minute
Friend1: no worries
Friend1: no sorries
me: i do believe I am almost to the point of laughing at horror movies... poof
Friend1: ha
me: although we rented planet terror and death proof the other night and laughed all the way through :P
Friend1: haha
me: okkkkk I am off again... I may be back, I may not be, I may be in atlanta or who knows... but my cell and computer are charged i gots a credit card and cash, i am goldennnnn
Friend1: best of luck
me: ok i be back... maybes if not i will catch you eventually soon : )
me: thanks
me: hmmm
me: break a leg is for shows
me: what is the wishing of luck phrase for this situation?
me: hehe
Friend1: no idea, but i'm sending it your way
me: thanks ok laters

me: ok d35 better be the last change :P
me: i feel like i am playing bingo
Friend1: here's hoping
Friend1: how long?
me: well at least hour they said the plane id delayed or the crew or something
Friend1: i'm sorry
me: ah thanks but piffle, it is still an adventure and i am putting the convos up on my blog, gives me somethng to giggle about
me: seriously, it is not baddddddd
me: and it is a story i now have
me: ok maybe it is a little bit pain in the ass
me: hehe
me: now if i can work it to get sympathy from some girl mega bonus
Friend1: best of luck with that
me: hehe
me: hey i should get some positive out of all this :P
Friend1: you should
me: that's right