Just Tripping Along The Freakazoid

Have you ever sat in a darkened room, the low bar lights and dance floor strobes the only light you see? Have you ever found your focus drawn, like a moth to flame, one sole quest, one small hope… That her eyes will catch yours. You spend the night, forsaking the crowd. You spend the night, ignoring the show. You spend the night, sitting there alone. The people swirl and the action happens but none of that holds your gaze. Perhaps a brief interlude takes you there, a flicker of a glance pulls you here. But you let your normal go, you bide your time, even as your mind always come back daring to hope… That her eyes will catch yours. You find tonight the flame you follow burns not with the crowd, not with the show, But with a wish you know will never happen… That her eyes will catch yours. You watch the way she moves and acts, when she smiles content, when she frowns in concentration. You map the way the world moves around her and the way she commands the world You study details, drinking...

Enjoyed the music/band last night - working through some projects and halfway through Lois and Clark first season Working on some stories and stuff - man I wish I could mix music, travel, writing and technology into some awesome job (throw in that special someone who likes to share those things and damn I am set for life!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Plus was treated (is it a treat? lol) to some twisted trivia (thanksssssssss Cindy so much - hehe) I posted mine below - as I told her - I really need to get out i think - someone save me from silly activities such as this, pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee :-P Ten Top Trivia Tips about Julie! There is actually no danger in swimming right after you eat julie, though it may feel uncomfortable. It took julie 22 years to build the Taj Mahal. The average human spends about 30 days during their life in julie. Julie is the only bird that can swim but not fly! Julie can be very poisonous if injected intravenously. Julie is the world's smallest mammal! There are mor...

My sister (and best friend) knows when I get in a real bad place how to make me laugh - she sent this to me saying it would be our new code - is it an OSM Day ('oh shit' Mike) day or an HM day ('Heyyyyaaaa' Mike) - hehe Today is more of the OSM day with a side of blue Sully but there are HM moments Like two teachers coming in today for Powerpoint training and I could barely tell them how to do a simple thing as they kept going back and forth like an old married couple - some how we went from how to insert images in PowerPoint to discussing the finer points (if there are finer points) of body odor. Then just as I am getting into the exciting world of changing bullet types we suddenly ended up in a discussion about (and how these topics were related I am still trying to work through myself - lmao) late nights, dogs vs. cats and fried sushi (and yes it took me unfortunately a few minutes to catch on to the joke regarding that last item and recognize the oxymoron - yes I ha...

Well another weekend gone and I have a longer to do list than when i started but ah well - onto the busy week but I did find out some things this weekend I like Rachel McAdams - she kicked butt in Redeye, a nice flick with a cool chick - lol (she was good in Family Stone too - something about her hair is just nice - ok everyone has things they like to look at - that happens to be one of mine, hair, who needs a pretty face when you got a great head of hair :-P haha) I like Broad Banned - a cover band I checked out at a local casino club - plan on catchng them again this week - the drummer was good and she sang some too - hope she sings more next time (and she had good hair too ;-) I like the Natural Academy of Sciences in Philly - may use that as one of the field trips for my geology class - I also am trying to find a good fossil site for them - maybe the place the first dino fossil was found I like my yellow smiley face nerf squeezie stress ball - I have been giving it a good workout a...

Whew – things have been busy but busy means less time to get bogged down with thoughts and ideas and things that are just idle fantasy and never to be realized (I wish no time - but alas my brain and emotions do not seem to like to be quiet and still always rumbling over topics). My co-worker left today – she's gone until the first of the month. This means I am pulling all of the training, incoming help needs of the staff, all of the tutoring issues that come up, and all other assorted fires that may appear in addition to my own work. This means I may become a master at hiding – just kidding – actually a lot of the tech department has a rep for hiding and other diversion tactics and I do not want to be known for never being able to be found – just means I will be ultra busy. My own work is hopping – I am the director of the NAF academies so planning events and meetings for that plus I was selected to be on focus group so more work there. I have been asked to help write the curric...

Memphis trip pictures are up - link on my web site or try this direct link - http://mywebpages.comcast.net/docwho2000/small/index.htm

http://www.stacie-orrico.net/videos.html

Why does everything hit at once so many times as you go through life? How come just when you think you are not too bad, self doubts and other thoughts begin to creep in around the edges and then life sends things your way to accentuate, exaggerate and pull out even more of these not so great thoughts and moods? Too much happened this week to even know where to begin, so trying to push them under the rug and this song keeps going through my head - the first line especially catches a thought I keep hitting - I really am lucky in so many things, but... BTW, LOVE the video for it as well, one of my favorite videos reminding me that all walks of like think what the song says, experiences these same self doubts and feelings.... yeah I'm spoiled and want more - oh well, on to tomorrow : ) Stacie Orrico More To Life I've got it all, but I feel so deprived I go up, I come down and I'm emptier inside Tell me what is this thing that I feel like I'm missing And why can't I ...

Obviously both start with the letter M and both belong together. I did a lot of music stuff during my trip. I went to the Stax recording studio and museum. Wow the history there. I learned a lot and liked listening to the music as I walked around. I hit the Smithsonian Rock and soul museum. That was a nice retrospective of Memphis and some of the music influence. They actually had a good piece on the roots of Memphis music and a look at a sharecroppers life and so on. Did the Gibson Guitar factory tour. OKAY that was awesome we walked right in - the factory was not operational on Saturday (my birthday - yes that is what I wanted to do for my B-day). But to just see the sweat, glue and guts that begin the journey of sounds I love so much - ok yes I am silly and got choked up. I got sawdust on my shoe and have not washed it off yet - lol. I so admire people in the music industry and here is another area to admire craftman and craftwomanship. I visited a cool venue called the New...

Well getting settled back in from trip - spent a lot of time at the division of motor vehicles today. I was changing the address on my license finally, and getting new license pates, transferring and title and doing registration to finally put the car I had been driving the last few years in my name. I actually, finally, for the first time in my life… own a car. Due to circumstances growing up (money and fact my mother was blind so could not drive anyways) I did not have a car growing up – then in grad school I lived in center city Philly and walked to the school so need for car there – then for the next stage the cars were in my ex's name so – this is the first time I ever owned a car – wow. It has like 163000 miles on it, is falling apart and I will be lucky if it sees the summer through – but damnit it is mine. It kinda just really hits home how much has changed for me these last two years (a lot a lot has changed) and how things keep changing (which is good in a way – I lik...

Well 2200 plus a smidgen miles, five days, four nights, and 4 states – quite a little trip. Did I enjoy myself – most of the time oh yeah. Did I do a lot, see a lot, think a lot, explore a lot. Oh yeah. Did I find what I was looking for and the real reason behind this trip and inner journey to "look" around…. That story is tbc - to be continued – so not really, but I did at least spend the time working through something.. not finished, but them most of us are a work in progress and I just have to be patient and things will happen – right? I have a bunch of trip stuff I wanna jot down – heck half of it is jotted down on museum brochures, ticket stubs, the back of my map printouts… anything I could find when a thought came up I wanted to keep around (for those who know me, thoughts often ramble through my mind at light speed – here today, gone yesterday is my ditzy, blonde slogan – lol So more trip stuff and even a link to some pictures in the next day or so (yes if you s...

Well I am sitting in a COmfort Inn in, um, somewhere Tennessee (runs looks at phone) Kingston TN :) Spent the day driving and thinking, thinking and driving. Listening to music and thinking. Stopping - trying not to think. Driving again, more music and more thinking - lol Actually when I do a major road trip, especially if on my own, I tend to pee my way across the continent (crude but accurate). See I drink then must stop and empty bladder and of course when I stop I get another drink. Then as I am driving and thinking I am drinking (And I love tea which goes right through you) So then I must stop again - if I took a picture of everywhwere I stopped, most of the pictures would include a toilet. Hmmm, perhaps I should write a book called Peeing across America - ok I think my brain is mush and stuck in crude mode. Although - that could be a gimmick - comparing restrooms in various places - I bet it has been done. Hmmm I come on this trip to try and cheer myself up as well as thin...

Well getting things set for my trip. Looks like I settled on memphis at least for now - lol and going to start tomorrow morning - how early remains to be seen. I got the rental car a little earlier today and now trying to finish burning my mix CDs. The rental car has a CD player - most awesome (my car does not, ah how deprived I am j/k). I also think the rental car people are certain I am nuts (of course I know that I am but I managed to convince yet more people on this planet of that as well). The car has automatic controls (which again my car lacks). So I sat in teh rental car parking lot for like five minutes (gross exaggeration it was only four and a half minutes) but just pushing the button to make my seat go up and down, forward and backward. I may not even need my pillow. Yes I sit on pillows to drive as my feet and the pedals need a little help in meeting. But there I am sitting in this rental pushing the buttons and playing with things. I am worse than a little kid. A...

It's 1:48 am - Technically Monday morning although it still seems like Sunday, January 2, 2006. I sit here at the computer, a quilt wrapped around my shoulders as I am a little cold and I alternate between staring at the computer, trying to find something on the Internet and thinking thoughts I should not think. Wanting things I can not have. Wondering if those two actions, thinking about something, well someone, and having what I am thinking about will ever cross. Right now I'd bet on probably not ever or for a real long time. I read the stories about people coming together, finding someone, how even a time like 11 months is a long time to be alone and here officially it will be two years in March. And unofficially I think I have been alone for a lot longer. Funny, I have not written like this in awhile. Not in bite-size sentences with distinct beginning and ends. Not felt surprising honest yet not morosely depressed as I write about this particular subject. This is me...