Just Tripping Along The Freakazoid

Ok finally got my copy (on sale even - bonus points all over) and I have only watched it twice so far - and I got my Seasons of Love (I love that song) medallion I picked up in NYC hanging right here to keep my spirits up when ever they start flagging (which is a bit lately but............ IT'S RENT - hehehehehehehe and yes Seasons of Love is fav song (I think light my candle is second - man what a pick up line/song - lol) and Angel Fav character OK back to movie - anyone ever for viewing this with me just holler and bring the kleenex (yes ok I still cry... sighhhhhh)

I was reading this great Dana Scully/ Monica Reyes fanfic http://www.geocities.com/a_k_naten/Amygdala-12.html - and I found a section of it just to be so much what i know I'll find someday, just to feel at that level with someone again would be wonderful. Actually I like the whole story and the progression of how the two feel and I know I am even more chicken than Scully in the story thus would never act on how I feel about certain people (dreams can be the best and most sad thing a person can possess) - but as I quoted before - I am a hopeful not a hopeless romantic someday... someday maybe I could be writing something like this again in my journals about me and someone :) from - http://www.geocities.com/a_k_naten/ScullyReyes.html Title: " Amygdala " by: A. K. Naten Rated: R-ish Summary: A short Scully/Reyes storyCross-Post: Okay, but my name stays intact and it’d be nice if you’d notify me first. I’ve been back to visit Monica every day for the past week...

Whew - work just keeps getting more and more fun... :-P attended a union meeting - the first one after the main body voted down the contract offered - man people were getting very soapboxy and snippy and geez... ok no more talking about unions before I voice my real thoughts on things Managed to get through my NAF meeting today - I really care about this program and such and just keep making more and more work for myself, but it is good - we managed to work up a few more events for the students including attending a chamber of commerce workshop about websites and businesses and a women in business conference... so I continue to plug away at NAF and having to do director things which I do not like but I keep doing - hey found out I should get a passport because NAF's summer conference is in Detroit and I guess Canada is just right there - hehe - so that might be nice - if I am not doing what I usually do at these conferences which is sign up for the extra workshops and end up supera...

I think I am really really f*ing angry I mean I read this article and really got pissed off. None of the other articles/issues that have come up with this lifestyle and my choices have ever gotten to me like this did for some reason. I just am like why, why focus on this when there is so much more in teh world that needs attention.... so much more.... I guess part of my pissoffedness is that some bleep, bleep person is going to tell me, tell ME what I can and can not do regarding my daughter (if I find someone some day who cares about me and my daughter enough to want to take a step to show that or if I found someone who wanted to share the enormous, enormous responsibility of raising a child together - and then someone I do not know is going to tell me I can not do that...) I read all the time about the problems with foster places and adoption and parent shortages and then...... then they are going to seem justified when there are people who can love and care and deserve the same cha...

Went to see Death Defying Acts - three edgy comedies by three edgy authors - a series of three one act plays put on by the Full moon theater co - a local community theater troupe. The plays were The Interview by david mamet, Hotline by Elaine May and Central Park West by Woody Allen. The last one was my favorite in terms of the play, the actors and just the whole staging of the scene. I really do like seeing plays, musicals and the like. I am going to try and get out tomorrow night - still not sure exactly where i will end up - thinking a couple of places like The Stone Pony or a place in Tom's River - but i really do want to pick up some live music tomorrow. Also hoping to get caught up with work and errands this weekend - and just relax some.

A fitting song I put up on myspace profile - eh - life is driven by fears more than anyone ever admits... some just are better at hiding, or overcoming than others - wish I was the overcomer of fears type - someday I will be, maybe, I just keep knowing I'll wind through life no matter what (and stumble along someone or even better they'll stumble over me - lol) :-D Fears - Natalia I am so afraid,I am so afraid of falling Why do my fears got to be controlling Over my soul ,over my plans Why am I so scared to miss this chance [CHORUS]All my life I was escaping from my dreams Never really tried to turn my head and set my feet On this ground Where I belong where I should be Do you believe in Destiny? Destiny How do I find,how do I find direction? that gives me all that gives me all the protection That I need,that I am searching for How do I become stronger then before ? [CHORUS] BRIDGE: My fears are taking over me All I can hear all I can see Is my misery [CHORUS] I’ve lost my sens...

Please forgive typos - one too many grapefruit juice, citus vodka and seltzer water over ice is making it a little hardto type. Add in I am on the laptop as cable modem is out because of the snow storm - evil storm that also cancelled my concert plans - second time I have missed Acceptance damn it. Friday was one of those days that kept getting worse - well it was bad until the very end when I got to post and write with one person (who really does not know but really her and my sister were the only things making the day and even week worth anything to me besides my little one too bad I am not a little more lubricated and could talk about how I really feel and what I wish about her and such - um anyhoos) but it started with trying to recou[p from the thursday luncheon which everyone said went well - as long as it helped the students - that is what matters but I kept getting caught by people and told things or asked - The county chamber of commerace has an education committee - the rep ...

Working on trying to do way too much. Coordinating this advisory board luncheon for NAF for tomorrow - I am the Director. Well I have a million things to do to coordinate that (printing name tags, seating charts, writing up a director's letter, cutting apart brochures, you name it I am doing it - lol) Plus, the worse, I gotta get up in front of over 40 students, teachers, administrators and important business people and at least talk a little - my stomach is hurting sooo bad and I am so scared - yeah I am a grown woman who is scared to death - yes I teach and get up in front of people - but I actually get badly nervous even then - but then as I teach it gets better and is fun eventually - lol - but speaking in front of groups of people especially business and administrators and such I am dying really really badly - a lot of work and focus on deadlines and having another project always around the corner and nothing or anyone to really balance craziness save my little one, my one ...

Whew Life is up and down and all around lately. Work atmosphere is weird, big changes coming maybes in my life depending on what happens at the school as it is fairly definite by July my boss will be leaving (which is why things are getting very busy now as she is the thing that keeps this school together and she is trying to get a number of projects in motion and done). Yesterday had busy day at work trying to coordinate a couple of events for the students in the National Academy Foundation academies (I am the Director of the three programs for our school). So lots of details there - I am multitasking queen. Then trying to do curriculum, teaching and all sorts of other things. School has so much going on in terms of what I do. Last night went back to Trump Marina and the Wave - this time the band was Usual Suspects - a nice cover band that did mainly 60s and 70s with a little bit of other stuff. There were the usually handful of people and some stories to watch (like in a small gr...